Sunday, September 23, 2018

Seahawks 2nd Half Haikus

Grandpa is in town
Teach him how to use iPad
Discuss gas prices 

Ford F 150
Get you a truck, makes roads cry
Spacious, tow your barn

Michelob Ultra
Chug it, do a slip n slide
Join the dang Marines

Football dentist guy
Office fantasy legend
XM waiting room

Wilsonnnnn! (Tom Hanks screech)
Tom Hanks would love Seattle
But he’ll need a nap

Blue eyed Liotta 
Ray quit smoking with Chantix
Fumeless Joe Jackson

Zeke stiff armed E.T.
Sent him back to outer space
Just Heismaned the 12s

Marshall did push ups
A brief Crossfit interlude
Billy Blanks fist pumped

October matters
It’s the only month that counts
Hibernate the rest

Hi Mike Solari
Looks like he yells at servers 
Cuz the food was bad 

Thank you Chris Carson
For being yourself, a boss
Drink the blue Kool Aid

Beasley one handed 
Not the same as OBJ
Playing the same sport? 

Everything makes sense
When I write, the world seems small
Just an illusion 

Fumble Elliott 
Probably thinking about
Northwest greenery 

Shaquem tackled him
He has half as many hands
And twice as much heart

Tavon not Kevon 
What if ‘twas Tavon Spacey
House of Yards *rimshot*

Sleeveless neon man
Your sweatshirt looks cold, shades on
Majestic beard flows

Geoff Swaim on Dallas
Super past tense of swimming 
Phelps: Greatest Swaimer  

Roughing the passer
Clearly means something else now 
History changes 

Take a bow, E.T. 
He keeps tip drilling pigskins
Herding Dak all day 

Water bottle flip
LeBron showed us how it’s done
Beauty pageant skill
Buy Chris's books SPONGE CAKE & WHAT'S IN THE FRIDGE? on Amazon 

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