Things Keanu Reeves May Do

1. Stab a mythical beast with a sword
2. Play the saxophone above average
3. Write a children’s book about a talking couch
4. Levitate
5. Be confused
6. Make a killer chimichanga 
7. Travel time in a phone booth
8. Look like a slacker
9. Be the world’s best assassin
10. Steer a canoe down a moderate rapid with a GoPro on his helmet
11. Love
12. Drive for Uber 
13. Vacation at a lakeside cabin in Montana
14. Fight in MMA
15. Peruse antique stores while sipping on a chestnut praline latte and listening to Sufjan Stevens