Shaq Free Throw Metaphors

1. A mountain lion stalking and terrorizing an innocent family of backpackers before devouring them 
2. A cobra being released in the middle of a classroom of kindergarteners 
3. A Starbucks with exclusively blind employees 
4. Shopping at Walmart on Black Friday
5. Dropping acid at Disney Land then losing your keys and friends
6. Getting incorrect directions from Maps on your iPhone 
7. Being cursed out by a dude with a goatee and road rage
8. Ryan Seacrest doing anything except hosting
9. Farting and you think it’s gonna be silent but it’s super loud and everyone in the office looks at you 
10. Watching a romantic comedy directed by Michael Bay