Dear Quarantine Diary,
Sign off. What are you doing on here? That screen time is off the hook. Take a walk and leave the phone on the bed. Get out there into nature. Go chase a squirrel. Don’t steal its nuts though - you won’t be able to find a health care provider if you catch a gnarly case of the rabies.
Stop following the news all day, erry day. It’s mostly garbage - biased, bought and brain-infecting. The news is like sports but without the mascots or...wait a second, the anchors are the mascots. It’s like a good ol’ fashioned college football mascot rivalry game on NCAA ‘04 from the legend...wait for it...ary EA Sports.
So take a break from binging your favorite show on Netflix - it’ll be there tomorrow and the next day. If your watching The Office on Netflix, though, that show is leaving at the end of 2020 but thankfully you have plenty of time to cuddle up with your couch-full of kittens and pre-packaged snacks.
Love,
Topher Gopher
Listen to my Oscar-winning podcast A Star Is Born
Get my books Sponge Cake & What’s in the Fridge?
Follow @chrisarneson8 on IG/ Save the 🐳
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