Jack Jack is a legit, straight up gawd, truly a five tool player and can only be described as the Jason Kidd of cartoon babies if you are into multifaceted prime time performers who can take it all the way to the crib. This sequel is dripping with the foul stench of millennial angst; if a Twitter Trending Topic were a film it would have more substance. TMZ reports have alleged that the director, Brad Bird, secretly used one of the characters (Elastigirl to be specific) to actually stretch the length of this feature an additional twenty minutes, though these rumors can neither be confirmed nor denied as Bird spends the majority of his free time holed up in his superhero lair which is located underground somewhere in New Jersey in parts that have not yet been explored by wayfaring and Wayfarer wearing guidos. Sure the movie is nearly flawless from a technical standpoint and everything was fine and dandy with all the characters and their progression since the first Incredibles but it would have been nice if Rachel Ray had Mission Impossible'd her way into the writer's room and just thrown some hot sauce on the plot, maybe some nice Tapatio or Cholula, to really spice things up and put the whole blueprint in more of a Shyamalan perspective, you know. Also, we as an audience (I'm speaking for all of us now...you're WELCOME) understand that Jack Jack has a treasure chest full to the brim of superhero powers at his disposal by this point in time but how is that going to help him get ahead of the other students when it comes to applying for colleges? (Can you imagine the mountain of stress that the guidance counselors for these superhero students must have to climb out from under at the kick off of every semester? I think we just stumbled onto a couple more sequels, Pixar, I will accept my royalty checks via Amazon Escargot mail (you know, like Amazon Go and snail mail combined with a French twist)...wow, I stretched almost as far as Elastigirl for that last one, that was nearly as impressive as that Michael Jordan dunk in Space Jam.) Last time I checked, that is NOT part of the demographics section in the application for most universities but I haven't checked for a few years so maybe things have changed with the higher education landscape and their relationship with the top young rising superheroes in the world.
Buy Chris's books SPONGE CAKE & WHAT'S IN THE FRIDGE? on Amazon
No comments:
Post a Comment