Monday, September 17, 2018

Seahawks 1st Half Haikus

Mitch Trubisky’s feet 
Are the key to his success 
Walk a mile but cleats 

Kendricks missed the pick
Would have shifted momentum 
A housewarming gift 

Bears shovel pass score
Digging their own football graves 
Groundskeeper Willies 

Tackling Chris Carson
Catching a swift dragonfly 
With a can of Coke 

I miss Jon Gruden
Never thought I would say it
I miss that goober 

Booger McFarland
Pocket square at the ESPYs
Pocket squares all day

Why is it sexy?
Describing strategy is
Objectively not 

Big Monday night next
Pirate ships, scurvy abound
Not bad for Harvard 

Hold JR Sweezy
No relation, JR Smith
Name jokes always fun

Almost a safety
Wilson is invincible 
Mark Wahlberg gets it

Third and twenty two
Out of your own dang end zone
Oxygen required 

Khalil Mack storming
Stripping and sacking fellas
Like the Bunny Ranch

Shaquill Griffin pick
Soaring backwards, plucking it
Johnny Applesea 

Playmakers make plays
A solid piece of wisdom
Cliches for breakfast 

Earl punched the ball out
Pete’s challenge flag not holstered
We will never know

Griffin once again
Another interception 
Working the tip drill

Flippin’ ten whole yards
Our punter shanked that baby
Cue Masters music 

The Monday night mic 
Actually pretty neat
Should be less boring 

What a leg Sebas 
No one saw that one coming
Except maybe you
Buy Chris's books SPONGE CAKE & WHAT'S IN THE FRIDGE? on Amazon 

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